Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Why Viragolog?

virago |vəˈrägō; -ˈrā-| noun ( pl. -gos or -goes) a domineering, violent, or bad-tempered woman. • archaic a woman of masculine strength or spirit; a female warrior.
That's why. Altho I aspire to the latter more oftem I manifest the former. Why? Depression, that's why. It sucks to be an African -American woman struggling with Depression in these here U-nited States. We are supposed to be the strong women, the leadin our people to freedom by the stringht of our bones women, We are supposed to be the feed everyone, hoe the fields, tend the house women. We are supposed to be Strong in our Afrikan Heritage, using Sistah strenght to keep our backs above water. Not weak like those Fey White women, needing to be cared for by their Mammies, fainting at every little vapor that blows their way.
But I'm weak. I dont want to get out of bed. I dont want to cary anything or anybody on my back anymore. I can barely lift my obese carcass out of bed & out the door( ok, that is a touch hyperbolic, but not much). I'm cranky & Bitchy & in pain. Soul pain. Brain pain. Ah when I was Anorexic I was told that Black girls didnt get that. Ha. Now I'm not really depressed 'cause Black women dont get depressed, we are way too strong...........
It's a brain disorder and we get it just like other people. And we suffer just like other people. But we tend not to get treated like other people. Well I'm getting treatment. I want to see my strenght, my virago nature. I don't want to be down so low anymore.

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